We've all been there. You join a virtual networking event, excited to connect with like-minded professionals, only to find yourself in a breakout room with someone who seems to have missed the memo on basic networking etiquette. A month ago, I experienced exactly this scenario, and it reminded me why establishing ground rules for virtual networking is more important than ever—and why the professionals who master these skills have a distinct competitive advantage.

The Situation That Changed My Perspective

Picture this: I'm in a breakout room of seven designed for collaborative discussion and relationship-building. Within minutes, one participant had completely taken over the conversation, speaking over others, dismissing different perspectives, and—perhaps most concerning—sharing incorrect information about the session's objectives. What should have been an engaging exchange became an uncomfortable experience that left most participants disengaged.

But here's what I realized: while this person was busy monopolizing the conversation, they were actually destroying their own networking potential. The other participants in the room were mentally checking out, and worse, they were forming negative impressions that would follow this individual long after the session ended.

The Hidden Cost of Poor Virtual Networking

The individual's behavior violated several fundamental principles of networking etiquette, but more importantly, it revealed a crucial misunderstanding about what networking actually achieves:

Dominating the Conversation: Good networking is about exchange, not monologue. When one person monopolizes the discussion, they don't just prevent others from contributing—they actively damage their own reputation and miss opportunities to learn valuable information that could benefit their career or business.

Dismissing Others: Interrupting or talking over fellow participants doesn't demonstrate expertise; it signals insecurity and poor emotional intelligence. In our interconnected professional world, the person you dismiss today might be the decision-maker you need tomorrow.

Spreading Misinformation: Perhaps most problematic was the confident delivery of incorrect information about our session goals. This created confusion and positioned the speaker as unreliable—the opposite of what effective networking should accomplish.

Ignoring Virtual Cues: In virtual settings, we rely heavily on visual and audio cues. Professionals who ignore raised hands, chat messages, or other attempts by participants to contribute miss critical social intelligence that separates average networkers from exceptional ones.

The Strategic Advantage of Exceptional Virtual Networking

Here's what the most successful networkers understand: virtual networking isn't just about making connections—it's about creating memorable, positive impressions that translate into tangible opportunities. The professionals who master these skills consistently report better job prospects, stronger business relationships, and more robust professional networks.

The Power Principles of Virtual Networking

1. Practice Strategic Listening Give others space to speak and genuinely engage with their ideas. The most connected professionals I know follow the 70/30 rule: they spend 70% of their time listening and asking thoughtful questions, and only 30% talking about themselves. This approach uncovers opportunities and builds trust faster than any sales pitch.

2. Respect the Format, Master the Game Whether it's a structured activity or open discussion, honor the intended format. If you're unsure about the objectives, ask strategic questions rather than making assumptions. This demonstrates emotional intelligence and helps you navigate the session more effectively.

3. Share the Spotlight, Multiply Your Impact In small breakout rooms, ensure everyone has an opportunity to introduce themselves and contribute. When you facilitate others' participation, you position yourself as a connector—one of the most valuable roles in any professional network.

4. Verify Before You Share, Build Credibility If you're sharing information about processes, requirements, or next steps, make sure you're accurate. When in doubt, direct people to official sources rather than guessing. Your reputation for reliability becomes your professional currency.

5. Use Technology as Your Networking Amplifier Mute when not speaking, use chat features strategically, and be mindful of your virtual presence. Master networkers use technology tools to enhance their presence, not detract from it.

6. Be Gracious, Stand Out Even when dealing with difficult personalities, maintain your professionalism. Others in the room will notice how you handle challenging situations—and they'll remember you for it.

Advanced Strategies for Virtual Networking Success

Before the Event

• Research attendees (if possible) using LinkedIn or event platforms to identify key connections

• Prepare three strategic questions that demonstrate your industry knowledge and genuine interest

• Test your technology and optimize your virtual presence (lighting, background, audio)

• Set specific goals for the number and type of connections you want to make

During the Event

• Arrive early to the event

• Use the chat strategically (if allowed by host) to share resources, ask follow-up questions, or connect with specific individuals

• Take notes on key insights and connection opportunities—this information becomes valuable follow-up material

• Be the connector by introducing participants with complementary interests or expertise

After the Event

• Follow up within 24-48 hours with personalized messages that reference specific conversation points

• Share valuable resources mentioned during your conversations

• Make strategic introductions between connections who could benefit from knowing each other

• Track your networking ROI by monitoring which connections lead to opportunities

Turning Challenges into Competitive Advantages

While my breakout room experience was frustrating, it also provided valuable insights. It reminded me that virtual networking requires even more intentional communication and mutual respect than in-person events. The professionals who recognize this and adapt their approach accordingly gain a significant competitive advantage.

When you encounter difficult personalities in virtual settings, use these strategies:

• Redirect diplomatically: "That's an interesting perspective, John. Sarah, I'd love to hear your thoughts on this as well."

• Use private chat to maintain connections with other participants when the main conversation becomes unproductive

• Document the experience as a learning opportunity and refine your approach for future events

• Follow up individually with other participants to continue meaningful conversations outside the problematic environment

The ROI of Exceptional Virtual Networking

The most successful professionals I know treat virtual networking as a strategic investment, not a necessary evil. They understand that a single well-managed virtual interaction can lead to:

• Career opportunities that wouldn't have existed otherwise

• Strategic partnerships that drive business growth

• Industry insights that inform better decision-making

• Personal brand development that opens doors long-term

Your Next Steps to Networking Excellence

Virtual networking is here to stay, and mastering its etiquette benefits everyone. By being mindful of our own behavior and strategically modeling good practices, we can help create the collaborative, respectful environments that make networking truly valuable—while positioning ourselves for greater professional success.

Take Action Today:

1. Audit your last virtual networking experience using the principles outlined above

2. Identify three specific skills you want to improve in your next virtual networking opportunity

3. Schedule follow-ups with connections you've made but haven't properly cultivated

4. Share this framework with your team or network to elevate everyone's virtual networking game